The Animals of the Iowa State Fair…I Surprisingly Don’t Mean the People
So, yeah, the Iowa State Fair is a lot like Disney World, except instead of being the happiest place on earth, it is the homeliest place on earth. To escape the deluge of dimwits who seemed to think that heavy traffic areas held prime real estate for sedentary sky viewing, I decided to check out the livestock barns. People watching is fun and all, but while future-Galileos discovered that the sky is blue, I was trapped in an unnerving spot between directionally-retarded strollers and confused mullets. Barns holding giant sheep with awkward underbites became my safe place. It should also be noted that I have a markedly strong aversion to smells, so the fact that a livestock barn transformed into my hangout should tell you something about the fair. But, you should still go.
Seeing that this is Iowa, there is obviously a heavy emphasis on agriculture and livestock. Besides shows and sales, there are contests for the largest bull, boar, ram (above), and rabbit. These animals, along with cute baby things, become the centerpieces in their respective barns. Some of the winners:
Bubba the Big Bull-2,768 pounds
Tiny the Big Boar-1,196 pounds
Fatty the Second Biggest Boar-1,176 pounds
These animals become novelty items at the fair because of their, ahem, size. We’re mature over here:
And, finally, some cuter things and an ostrich:
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It looks like some of the Mullet crew have been interbreeding with the livestock….I just hope they got the those poor animals really drunk first….
Top Tip – Don’t let your friend Alex anywhere near the State Fair he might either mistake it for an all you can eat challenge (a live on the hoof version) or be locked up as an exhibit ‘The amazing eating man’ with big signs saying
“Don’t feed the animals”
“Keep all extremities away from the bars”
“Feeding times – On the hour every hour”
Hahaha….I totally need to tell him to come read your comment.
Tell Alex if he ever visits the BlackLOG he is welcome to eat anything except The cats, The Beast and Mrs B….
I was going to sayt that I find this odd. That I can’t believe that ppl would send their entire afternoon looking at animals, and then I realised I’ve spent a fair number of days at the zoo.